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Sunday 27 November 2016

Ugh!

I was rearranging the ironing pile yesterday when I came across two perfect little white orbs.
Photo of two little gecko eggs in palm of hand
Gecko Eggs
Now I've seen a few strange things in my time in Australia but nothing like this. So, like the curious fool I am, I picked them up! (Well they LOOKED harmless!) At first I thought they were tiny white pebbles but then I was struck by their symmetrical perfection and that's when it occurred to me that they might be "organic"... So, I tried to squish them. Why I did this - I have absolutely no idea! Because the possible ick factor was high - very high! But they didn't give, so I examined them again. I was impressed - they were hardy little things - whatever they were.

La-la came into the room and saw that I was looking at something in my hand.

"Whatchya got there, mother?" she asked.

I showed her what I'd found and, her being the National Geographic / Discovery Channel eco warrior, animal loving princess that she is, I was pretty sure she'd know. She scrunched up her face.

"Hmmmm... eggs," she said, "definitely some type of egg but what type of egg - that is the question."

I looked at her, not quite sure now about holding something in my hands that had the distinct possibility of a creature hatching out of it!

"Well what do you think?" I asked, just a hint of panic in my voice now.

"Could be cockroach," she replied.

She said something else too but I didn't hear it. I'd heard the word "cockroach" and that was it! With my hand stretched out in front of me as far as it would possibly go - without actually dislocating my shoulder - I ran down the hallway. I may even have been screeching and ughing - yes that's now officially a word! I reached the back door and wrenched it open. With one final, "Ugh!" I flung those babies as far as they would possibly go!

Photo of cockroach
Ugh!

I turned around to find a disgusted animal lover looking at me with a shocked look on her face.

"Or gecko eggs," she said, "they just might have been gecko eggs! But I don't suppose we'll ever find out now."

I narrowed my eyes to slits.

"You said the cockroach word," I informed her, "you know what even just the mention of those vile things does to me!"

"Humph! She announced, "I'm going to get the ipad now and find out exactly what poor creatures you have thrown into the wind!"

By the time I had sufficiently recovered and joined the rest of my family upstairs, the general conclusion was that they must have been spider eggs - like giant spider eggs! Visions of waking up during the night to a super-sized Huntsman on my face looking for revenge for her babies sent a shiver down my spine. I was secretly planning on moving out when Big Daddy whispered in my ear, "we're only having you on, you're okay, they're not giant spider eggs."

Photo of the Huntsman Spider
One of The "Locals"! The "Giant" Huntsman Spider
Ugh!

It's not in Big Daddy's nature to admit to a prank so now I was even more concerned!

A snake! I thought to myself, that bastard knows they're snake eggs!

I called La-la over.

"Is there a chance those eggs were snake eggs?"

She ponders my question.

"There's a possibility..."

"Sweet Jesus!!" I exclaim. I now had visions of a mama snake sinking her fangs into me in the middle of the night (cuz everything horrid happens in the middle of the night!) in retribution for throwing her babies away. At this stage I was moving out and taking MY babies with me.

"But more than likely gecko eggs," La-la reassured me.

I located the ipad and stabbed the words, "gecko eggs" into the google search engine.

I sighed with relief when images of the perfect little orbs I'd held in my hands appeared on the screen. A revenge seeking gecko, I could deal with.

Only thing is, I betchya any money it's supposed to be lucky to find gecko eggs and I've probably gone and thrown it away! Ah well at least I can stop worrying about being poisoned to death by a snake or giant spider in my bed - if I can avoid that, then I'll count myself lucky enough!

Monday 21 November 2016

They Seek Him Here, They Seek Him There But Santa Is Simply Everywhere!

I was walking along the local strip of bars and restaurants the other day with the kiddies when the Dude suddenly grabbed my hand and said, "don't look now but Santa is sitting at that restaurant."

Photo of a nice urban corner with coffee shops and high end retail stores
Part Of The Local Strip

I immediately started "looking". 
"Mum, stop!" The Dude demanded.
"Why?" I asked, "why do you not want me to see Santa?"
"Because," he replied, "I haven't exactly been on my best behaviour in the past few days and if he sees me he might be able to tell."

I struggled to hold back my smug grin.

"Ok," I said, "you walk on a bit and I'll have a peek and see if it really is him."
The Dude was thrilled with this idea and immediately skipped away.

However, at this stage his sister was wondering what the hell was going on. He hadn't got far when she turned around to say something and obviously spotted "Santa".

"Oh my God!" she announced, "there's a guy over there that looks just like Santa!"

At this point I just HAD to see this guy!

I turned and my mouth dropped as I confirmed with my own eyes that Santa was indeed having coffee in the local 'hood. He was dressed in a mustard yellow shirt with light brown trousers but there was no doubt this guy was Santa! I turned back to The Dude to tell him he was right, only to discover my son beaming brightly and waving at Santa! On being spotted, he'd obviously very quickly changed strategy!

Richard Attenborough as Santa Claus in the movie Miracle On 34th Street
In His Usual Guise of Red Suit
The One & Only
 Santa Claus!

I turned again to look at "Santa" who was now smiling and waving back at the Dude. He then gave a special wave and a nod and a wink in my direction and a mutual understanding passed between us. I nodded and smiled back and I laughed all the way home.

Ah Santa - they seek him here and they seek him there but Santa?  Santa is everywhere!😀

Sunday 13 November 2016

Together Forever

I was sitting on the couch with the Dude cuddled up to me last night and as is his way - he started asking random questions...

The Dude: Mum, how old will I be in fifty years time?
Me: Well you're eight years old now so add fifty years on.
The Dude: Fifty-eight?
Me: Yes.
The Dude: Can people live to one hundred?
Me: Some, but it's not common.
The Dude: Will you and Daddy live to one hundred?
Me: I don't think so but we'll give it our best shot.
The Dude: Oh.

Photo of elderly lady with happy 100 birthday card
The lovely Dorothy Howe - who credited
her reaching 100 years to drinking
a generous amount of whiskey!

At this stage I realised there was something going on and I could almost hear the whirring noises inside his brain. I paused the new Star Trek movie we were all supposed to be watching, reasoning that I could wait another few minutes to see where Captain Kirk and his crew would, "boldly go where no man has gone before."

Me: What is going on Dudey? What's on your mind?
The Dude: I'm just trying to figure out how old you and Daddy will be fifty years from now and how old I will be.
Then his little voice faltered and I could see his eyes shining bright with unshed tears, "I just want us all to be together forever," he whispered.

photo of woman with young boy who is making a strange face
The Dude And His Mammy

I looked into those eyes - so full of pure love and for a few seconds my heart stopped beating and my whole body felt as if it had melted. However, behind the love I could see a glimmer of fear and I knew I had to reassure my boy.

"It's not whether myself and Daddy live to be a hundred or if you live to be fifty-eight," I assured him, "the important thing is to love each other in the here and now and not to worry too much about the future. We just need to take each day at a time and get the most out of being together and have lots of fun."

He smiled a watery smile and slid his little arms around me. "Okay Mummy," he said, "I'll do that but can you try to live to be a hundred anyway?"

I smiled and promised him I'd give it my best shot!

Fifty years from now I'll
be digging into one
of these!